Seen. Beloved. Redeemed.

Hey everyone. This is the final blog of my Training Camp Mini Series. While at training camp I experienced God in a way that was so much more than I ever imagined. The 3 truths He spoke into me repeatedly at training camp, through songs, feelings, my teammates, and even thoughts that seemed like I was hearing it, are that He sees all of me, He loves me the most, and He has redeemed me through that love. So if you’ll stick with me, I just want to share my heart on these truth with you. 

“I see you, but not the you that you have been sharing with the world, rather, the entirety of who you are and who I am making you to be”. He sees the beautiful daughter he created. I felt Him speaking that truth into me shaking the wall of lies I have built to ‘protect’ myself. How often do we struggle because we have felt unseen? Or we feel unknown? I know I have struggled with this my entire life. I have struggled with feeling unknown and unseen because I have been hiding behind a wall built on lies of unworthiness and unlovability. At training camp God asked me to give him a couple bricks from that wall so that I could be seen. Truly seen. It was terrifying and had me looking like an emotional mess. This looked like me opening my arms in worship, something that doesn’t seem like it should be hard and yet felt like the most vulnerable thing in the world, to physically open myself to Him. He asked to remove some bricks and repeatedly told me “I see you”.

“You are beloved”. This was the next hard truth He spoke into me. He saw me, all of me, and He loves what He created. You are so loved. You are my daughter. He spoke these truths into my soul and he removed another brick of lies built on unlovability. He says, “you are my beloved daughter”. And the greatest thing about God is that He is saying all of this to each one of us everyday. We just have to listen and believe. He sees each of us and loves us so much and at training camp was the first time I truly felt healing from these truths. 

“You are redeemed”. This was the final truth God revealed to me at training camp. He said I see you for who I am creating you to be and you are beautifully loved. Then He removed another brick of lies build on unworthiness. He said “I have deemed you worthy of love and grace. I have deemed you worthy to be my beloved daughter. I have deemed you worthy to be a part of my mission for the world, to be a part of sharing these truths with the world.” 

I still have bricks He is working to remove. Bricks of lies that have been built throughout my life. And man does it hurt and it is hard to allow Him to remove those bricks. It was the hardest week of my life spiritually because He was asking everyday for me to release control of my heart. He was asking everyday for the removal of one more brick. He was asking everyday for another chip of the false identity I have clung to. And it left me seeking for who He is making me to be. 

I left training camp feeling lost in who I am made to be, but founded in that my Father sees me, loves me, and has given me redemption. I left training camp broken down in humility so that he can now fill those holes with his truths and my identity with him. I know this journey is going to be hard and at times feel painful, but how beautiful it will be and how wonderful that he loves me so much that he seeks me out to fill me with his truths and light. Everyday is another opportunity to say YES! to God. Another day to have a yes in my spirit. 

I hope sharing this will help you guys to find healing and growth. I know this is my experience, but He speaks these truths for each of you as well and I hope one day, if you are hiding from Him, that you will hear these truths and believe. That you will begin to say yes everyday to whatever God speaks into your life. 

Love y’all.